The Millionaire Matchmaker is back, and Patti Stanger has moved the Millionaire's Club to New York City.
She may have needed a change after she broke off her engagement with Andy Friedman in August. Well, actually, the show was probably filmed before the breakup, but still. This season, Patti and her team are taking on Manhattan.
Destin was responsible for the move, as Chelsea left the company. She's been replaced with intern Andreea (pronounced Ahn-dray-uh).
The season opener featured a guy who Patti called a "Guido" and a 26 year hold stuck up heiress. The heiress has a child with a man twice her age and demands a Jewish guy who is not from Staten Island and does not wear Ed Hardy.
The millionaire, Derek Tabacco, is Jersey Shore and half. You know what I mean - Staten Island accent, likes hot women with nice butts (he said it in a less nice way) and is all about the sex.
Bryce Gruber is the millionairess. She owns the website "The Luxury Spot." She comes from money, makes money and has child support coming in. However, she's never found love and is looking for the man of her dreams.
Andreea turned out to be a problem right from the start. She couldn't weed out the losers from the qualified candidates to date the millionaires. Then, Patti gave her a list of girls to find for the mixer, yet she brought younger girls instead. Later, she ended up enticing Derek and making him want to date her, which is a major no-no for a Millionaire's Club employee.
Bryce was completely underwhelmed by all of the guys at the mixer. The guys were all too young, too lame or not cute enough. No wonder she couldn't find a man on her own - she can't even find a guy in a room full of qualified Jewish men. Bryce ended up allowing Patti to choose the men for her since she didn't like anyone.
She ended up going through with the dates, but managed to alienate both of the guys. One guy said he's a kid at heart, and Bryce said something along the lines of 'Like cartoons and cereal?' Seriously, Bryce, seriously?!?
Derek selected two girls to date: one who was good for him and another who was too young. He ended up selecting the younger girl for his master date. Patti was not happy.
Derek and his date ended up having a good time. The girl, Colby, was totally smitten with Derek. They had fun with wine, cheese and sports. Derek showed his fashionable side by picking out several outfits for Colby to wear. It was cute!
Derek was aware that he picked the wrong girl, so Patti is hopeful she'll find another date for him.
Bryce and her date, Keith, didn't have the same luck. It felt like they barely had anything to talk about. Fashion-wise, Bryce surprised me. She's super stuck up, but she wore a plain t-shirt and jeans on the first part of her date. Where's the effort?
Bryce seemed to be appalled by the concept of sex. She's actually abstinent, but when her date said that he's good at sex, she looked like she was going to pass out.
While Bryce's date said he'd date her again, Bryce shot that down. Destin said he'd try to find more matches for her, but the hope for finding a man for her isn't looking good.
On next week's Millionaire Matchmaker...
Next week, Bravo will whore out its other shows by featuring Caroline Manzo's sons on The Millionaire Matchmaker. If you aren't aware, Caroline Manzo is one of the stars of The Real Housewives of New Jersey. It's like television incest - only it's actually a good thing. (Real incest, bad. Mixing the best of Bravo shows? Oh so good.)
Note: Derek, if you read this, thank you so much for linking this article from your Facebook page! You were great on the show. (I added you as a friend on Facebook using my real name - Cadence is a pseudonym.)